Tuesday, May 3, 2016

How to be The Best Classic Car Restorer's Wife

How to be a Classic Car Restorer's Wife,
That He Could only Dream Of!

  • Get a job, preferably TWO jobs
  • Throw out all necessary food out of the refrigerator and replace it with beer
  • Have a portrait of your husband done.  Place in in a prominent place in your home,  Show it to your children often so they don’t forget who their father is.
  • Notify all friends and family that until further notice. All his mail, packages etc. should be addressed to the garage.
  • Stock of on “grab-me-something-to-eat-real-quick-will-ya” foods, so that malnutrition does not set in.

  • Send him an inter-garage memo twice a week concerning the possibility of sleeping, but don’t expect immediate results.
  • If he leaves to chase parts on a Saturday morning, place a name tag on this t-shirt with his address, phone number and the day, month and year on it.
  • Notify him twice a month of any deaths or serious illness in the family
  • Stock you was room with Spray “n Wash.  In case of an emergency, buy a shovel and select a site in the backyard where you don’t plan to grow anything for many years.  Spray N’ Wash can not work miracles!
  • If your husband has a clean-up job, stock his bathroom with the following items, paint remover, wire brush, Lave, a Safety Kleen parts washer, and navel jelly.  Place newspapers on the floor at strategic areas of your home from the garage.  Suggest paths to the refrigerator, bathroom, telephone charger, and the bedroom.  The path to the bedroom is optional and deemed unnecessary in most cases.
  • There is an alternative to this; put on you grubbiest clothes, throw caution to the wind, forget your manicure and get out there and help!  Have fun and get covered with grease and  gunk.  If you do this, you will need TWO bars of Lava!

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